HYPETRAIN: A Real Lick And A Promise

Do immigrants and or polysyllabic words frighten you to an unreasonable extent? Are you adequately prepared to have your socks and/or full-length Western boots blown away?

I got my old guitar and some fishin poles
So baby fill that cooler full of something cold

Don’t ask just pack and we’ll hit the road runnin’

Honey what do you say…

About country dancing!?

Yee-haw, cowboys! It’s casual sequel time! Brought to us by none other than the aptly named GameMill Enterntainment, it’s the successor to the roootinest and tootinest dance game around: that’s right, Country Dance 2! Perfectly engineered for that lucrative audience between gamers and rednecks, it’s sure to be a real lick and a promise! Whatever that means!

Plug in your Wii-Mote and start practicing your Wii-Mote do-si-do, (however it is defined), because when you slide in the disc and hear Miranda Lambert croon about the things she’s going to do to her abusive husband’s face with her shotgun, you won’t be able to help yourself! You’ll strut right over to your little lady and invite her to partake in the brand new duet mode, complete with separate moves for both partners.

She's as pretty as a picture, every bit as funny as she is smart

Fall into line, cattle! It’s line dancing time! Hee-yah!

Also new to this rough and ready pile of horse manure is the exciting sing-along feature! Imagine: Montgomery Gentry himself singing about how he’s perfectly entitled to dress in his signature Neanderthal style, and now you can musically express your empathy. You’ve been made fun of for much too long for playing country music themed Wii shovelware! You’ll stomp around your living room and sing in a bad Southern accent if that’s what your heart desires! What do you think about that, Mom?

So, go buy a cheap cowboy costume from the Halloween store! Country Dance 2 hits this holiday season, and if you aren’t way too into cowboy stuff already, I doubt you’ll be buying it.